New York’s Most Beautiful People, August 2012 Edition

1. Man working snack bar in Staten Island Ferry waiting area, after handing me $16 in ones, says, “Sorry about that.” He looks me over. “Hey, now you can go to a topless bar! That’s what you’ve been waiting all your life for, right?” 2. Walking through Times Square, I am telling my companion that current […]

Crocodile Dentist

When I was younger, I wanted more than anything to pull a light down and close to a crocodile. To ask him politely to open his mouth. To have him comply. To grasp my little mirror and hook and start pressing and scraping , ivory surface, white surface, bits of maybe-brown that I would have […]

Which Do You Want First

Bad news is a potato and good news is truffle oil. I love truffle oil, but I feel strange about it immediately. What do you do with it? If you agree, I know you like Woody Allen. Bad news is a fine, solid business. The potato I can’t live without. I know what to do with […]

Midsummer

She’s still living with the consolation-prize cat. “Haughty,” she says. “Patches gives me the cold shoulder.” My grandmother, the cat, and I, all green eyed, all on the couch. “They are building a new Alzheimer’s unit,” she says. “I don’t think I have it. Do you?” The cat jumps to the windowsill to watch the […]