Where I’m From

*Note: this writing reflects nothing on actual, true-life Schurmans, and their actual “issues,” as I solely lay claim to said “issues,” and all the other Schurmans are wonderful people who have generously tolerated both my serious and my flippant remarks for 33 years. All genealogical information is based on my sloppy and cursory clicking through Ancestry.com. The Schurmans certainly did not come over on the Mayflower– they came from Amsterdam some time later. It is true that many Schurmans remain in Canada, while I am descended from those who returned to America, obviously because they realized how awesome the colonies turned out to be, or (more likely) because they were not laid back enough to make it as Canadians.

Going In Blind

So I went out with this guy. He looked good. He was older, but he was in pretty good shape. After his buddy had checked me out, we zipped around the corner and started getting to know each other. I slid from one gear to another, and I thought we were getting somewhere. Now we were on our way.

Wedding

The first time, I froze in a stall as the bride’s mother barged in looking for someone else, who was probably crying somewhere else. I took a deep breath, and returned to my table, where the rest of the guests sat neatly paired up. The second time, I stared at myself in a dimly lit […]

Children of an Idle Brain

In English, we use the same word for “sleeping hallucinations” and “fantastic goals.” They are both “dreams.” They are both suspicious, both frequently denied consideration. I want to go to Africa. That is a wide-awake dream. I’ve wanted to go since I saw “Out of Africa” as a kid. The main character was my hero: […]