Writing on adventures both exotic and banal.
When we last left the mansion the score was: gas, on, furnace, blazing; water, off. Drought conditions continued to plague the carriage house. At times, they felt Biblical in proportion, although they were not. Friend of a friend (let’s call him FOF) came by with his helper. The door was locked. Could I zoom away […]
Read More Drought ConqueredI woke up this morning, remembered I still didn’t have water, and I wished I were Betty Draper. I imagined myself married to a rich man, rolling over and ringing the bell for the maid. But water would soon be restored! After three trips to the water department, I had paid the back bill my […]
Read More What The Ghost of George Myers Owes MeMyers’ mansion may be cursed. The last owner moved to Kansas City, had his whole life fall apart, and evacuated the midwest. The owners before that, I am told, suffered a nasty divorce. Curses are so sexy, though. My fellow squatter, who had been managing the bills, disappeared. The gas company put the shut-off notice […]
Read More Squat“What do you want me to do with Wooly Bully?” my mom asked. She had presented me with some plastic trash bags of stuffed animals, the most prominent member of which was the gentleman who prompted the discussion to begin with– my first husband. “Do with him?” I said. “What do you mean?” Like, were […]
Read More On My First Husband
Going On 